Ugh

You may or may not have noticed that I haven't been writing that much lately. This is not limited to the electronic pages of this blog, but to everything in general. Yet for once, it's not because I've been busy, but more because I haven't really had anything to write about that didn't involve school. I have this hesitance to write about school (and probably justly so). Privacy laws and everything. But the rhythms of my life are dictated by the ring of an electronic bell, and there is sadly little else. So, I don't write. Because there's nothing to write about. I prefer silence to pointless drivel. You're welcome.

The Last Hurdle

Today, November 12, 2009, I jumped the final hurdle into adulthood with the addition of a single card to my wallet: a Sam's Club Advantage Membership card. Not only am I old enough to have one, I'm old enough to care about the price difference when you buy bulk. Sure, there are other things in my wallet that say, "Look at me, I'm not a little girl anymore," credit cards, proof of insurance, money...but there is something distinctly grown up about a Sam's card. Probably the fact that it's not something I will brag about to my friends. Oh, I'll tell them, as I'm telling you, but I won't brag, I'll bemoan its presence in my wallet, adding a fraction of an inch to the thickness and a decade of age to its owner. It's the only card that does that (except for maybe an AARP card, but ignore that, I'm being melodramatic). A credit card says, look at me, I don't even need money! A driver's license says, why yes, I can give you a ride! A learner's permit says, why yes, I can make the car stall in the middle of the road! But a Sam's Card...it says, yes, I can purchase 36 Cup o' Noodles in the same package!

So, if you see me around and I'm leaning on a large mountain of Cup o' Noodles, you know why. Give me a nod, and welcome me to grown-up-hood.

21 Hours and Counting

"The Foreigner" goes up tomorrow night, yet I'm strangely calm. Maybe it's because I've done this before. Maybe it's because I fell strangely detached because I've had to be at ESOL class two nights a week rather than at rehearsal. Maybe it's because I'm just having a hard time caring this year. Maybe it's because I've lowered my expectations. Regardless, I'm calm, and I'm trying to decide whether that's a good thing or a bad thing.

I've realized that regardless of my mental/emotional state, the show will go on, and it will probably be relatively good. Sure, the run time might be a little long, but that's okay I guess. There's nothing I can do about it at this point, so why should I worry?

In fact, I think this is the most comfortable I've felt about the technical side of things. We actually programmed light cues this year. I have three reliable people running the boards. I think I can actually sit and watch without having to worry about the house lights not coming up. Or maybe I do. Maybe I'm being foolhardy.
Anyway. There's that.

NaBloPoMo

I'm an avid reader of blogs. By 'avid,' I mean that I read 6 or 7 every day via Google Reader (yay Google Reader), and one of the things that starts popping up this time of year is NaBloPoMo: National Blog Posting Month. It's a challenge to write 30 posts in 30 days throughout the month of November. That's one a day. So, when the blogs I read started talking about them (okay, I think there was really only one that mentioned it, but that was enough), I began thinking about participating. I've never posted more than 9 times in a month, so this is going to be a challenge, especially since I've almost failed before even starting (it's currently 11:53 PM, not getting started on the best foot).

Anyway, I have no idea what I'm going to post for the next 30 days, but I'm going to try to do it. Care to join me?

Panama

I'm having one of those evenings when I really feel like I should be writing something, and for once the normal excuse of, "I haven't done anything interesting lately" doesn't apply. The thing is, I have done something interesting lately. It was interesting while I did it, but my week long vacation in Panama was deliciously normal. In answer to the question, "How was your trip?" I can only respond, "Good. It's a beautiful country. That canal thing is pretty cool. Oh, and they have a really old church that's kind of in ruins now 'cause they used it to build the new city after the fire. Oh, and I went zip-lining in El Valle." That's not to say that I didn't have a good time. On the contrary, it was a lot of fun and I saw some pretty cool stuff, but I didn't get arrested or anything. Not that I wanted to. There was that time in the Canal Museum that I sat down on a bench and the guy told me not to (it wasn't roped off. I'm still perplexed as to why they would put it there in prime sitting position without some kind of signage telling people not to sit on the antique railroad benches).

All that to say, I had a great time in Panama. If you want details feel free to ask. Since a picture is worth a thousand words, here are a few. Click for larger images. (Update: I just clicked on some of them, and they're not bigger. I don't know why. Sorry.)

Cathedral ruins in Panama la Vieja. I'm jumping in this picture, that's why half of my legs are missing. I do, in fact, have legs.

The view from the top floor of that tower. That's part of the modern Panama City through the window. It's massive.

Climbing on ruins in Panama la Vieja. Yeah, you can do that there.

They had these crazy, fume-spewing buses. Apparently I'm famous there. They named one after me.

The next day we went to Casco Viejo. The National Theatre was open for visitors. Yeah, it's was pretty awesome. They have a raked stage. Teaching tool! Yes!

In El Casco Viejo there are beautiful buildings like the National Theatre right next to run down ones like this.

The sad thing is that it was obvious that this house was once quite beautiful (it even had a pool), but they left it to mother nature for whatever reason (probably financial).

A trip to Panama wouldn't be complete without visiting the Panama Canal. There it is. These are the Miraflores locks on the south side of the Canal. You can see a container ship in the far lock (behind the building). Those containers are about the size of a tractor-trailer.

Another container ship entering the locks from the lake.

The view from the Causeway towards Panama City. The Causeway connects two small islands to the mainland and was constructed from material removed to make the Canal. Talk about a pile of dirt.

Me in the harness getting ready to go zip-lining in El Valle. Look at my bad self.

It's super blurry, but that is indeed me going down that zip-line. Surprisingly enough, I wasn't at all afraid. I think I might be a little bit crazy. Either that or I just got used to heights from working in grid in the PAC.

I stopped a little early and had to pull myself the last few feet.

"THAT WAS AWESOME!"

There's this huge stone wall in the jungle with writing from the indigenous people. It is a lost language, so no one knows what it means.

A picturesque waterfall. El Valle is full of little rivers. On the way back from the wall writing place, Curt and I decided to forgo the use of a bridge and cross one. I fell in. I got my shoes and shorts wet. Thankfully the camera was saved.

Blog Re-Design

I did a minor blog re-design today, so if you generally read this (people actually read this?) via RSS feed, please check it out and let me know what you think. I figured that after four years of the same thing it was time for a change. The picture is of the fly rail in the PAC. It is in serious need of some maintenance as you can tell by the loose ropes, which is one of those things that I'm hoping will be fixed this summer. Fat chance with the current budget situation.

Why I Do My Job

The girl that wrote this note on my board made my life suck last year. We had clashes almost daily. At the beginning of this year, she was on the top of my list of people to kick out of the class because it was too large. That ended up not happening, and I'm so thankful that it didn't. This kid--no, young adult--has surprised me with her maturity, and I'm looking forward to working with her next year.

This kid is just a naturally talented young person, and I'm hoping she's in my class next year too. Not quite as "afternoon special " as the first, but I touched by it as well.

That's why I do my job, the off chance that maybe I'm making a difference in these peoples lives. I'm thankful that I got to see some of the fruits of my labor.

Valentine's Day

It's almost Valentine's Day around here, a day in which I rarely see the sky due to the large volume of whale-sized balloons floating above my head. I didn't mind Valentine's Day so much in high school; there lived a small hope inside me that at some point in time I too would be able to carry one of those ridiculous balloons around all day. College wasn't so bad either, because there were a large number of people just as bitter as I who encouraged the wearing of black t-shirts in observance of Single's Awareness Day. Here on the other end of both, I just want to take a pair of scissors to the balloons and explain ever so kindly to the giggly girls that the oh-so-sweet boys just wants to get in their pants. They shed a tear as the leaking balloons lay in piles around my feet. Alas, cutting devices are frowned upon in public high schools.*

Happy Valentine's Day.

*Hyperbole.

The Great Purge of 2008

Apologies for not posting for two thirds of the month of December. Despite not having anything to do after school officially, I still found myself there until 6 or 7 at least two nights a week. Hopefully I will learn to say 'No' very very soon, lest I become permanent fixture in the PAC and set up a cot in the prop room.

Anyway, a much needed Christmas vacation is finally upon us, and I am spending this, the first official day thereof, cleaning my room. It has been in dire need of a normal cleaning for several weeks, considering the amount of dirty clothes, random papers, and shoes scattered across the floor and my desk. However, I've also decided that this is the perfect time for a purge of things that I saved due to 'sentimental value' that no longer have any sentimental value. It's surprising how the mind/heart/teenage-girl-inside-all-of-us forgets the things that seemed so important at the time. So far I've thrown out some pictures of Leonardo DiCaprio a friend gave me out of her Bop Magazine in 7th grade (I shudder to thing that I ever wanted such a thing), an entire years worth of 'The Torch' (my alma mater's student newspaper), my acceptance letter to UCF (why did I keep that?), and financial aid information from FSU (I doubt that had any sentimental value to begin with). Along the way I've been sidetracked and succumbed to the desire to crack open my senior year book, look fondly upon my glory days, and cringe at the fact that I hadn't fixed my hair before they took my senior picture.

On another note, my New Years resolution last year was to post 75 times. It doesn't look like I'm going to make it without a concerted effort at daily self expression for the next ten days. Any suggestions on what to write about?

Pet Peeves

I didn't think I had pet peeves. Sure, there were things that bugged me a little bit, but nothing that drove me really insane. Then I became a teacher. I now have several. The most prevalent is the mispronunciation of words/use of words that don't exist.

Here are the top three, with plenty of snark on the side:
Anyways. It's not a word (okay, maybe it was in the 13th Century, but it's not standard today). But somewhere along the line, teenagers must have decided that since there are multiple 'ways' there must be multiple 'anyways,' which is, of course, not the case. Somehow, it wormed itself into even the smartest of students' vocabulary and frequently rears its ugly S-shaped head. I do my best to battle the unnecessary 'S' wherever I may find it. I am slightly ashamed to admit that I too have on occasion succumbed to its awful powers. But thankfully, the light of proper grammar always shines through, and I return to the singular 'anyway.'

Supposably. This, I'm guessing, comes from the lack of written word in teenagers' lives. They heard the word 'supposedly' but have never seen it written, so their brain didn't have anything to connect it to. I believe the term for a misheard word is mondegreen, but I could be wrong. Anyway, we now have supposably, a bane of my existence. And now, a short anecdote: I once was lecturing about Greek theatre history and used the word 'supposedly.' A hand shot up in the back row. Ah, I thought, an eager young mind! and nodded for the student to speak. I was simultaneously amused and appalled by what I heard. "Miss," the student said, "don't you mean 'supposably?'"

Ax. No, not the tool used to chop wood, the verb meaning 'to inquire of'. That's right, fair reader, medieval weaponry has been confused with the simple, harmless verb 'ask'. I'd heard this mispronunciation many times before I began teaching, but the frequency since has driven me to the edge of frustration, so much that I've even created a sign. It reads, "No! You may not AX me a question. You may, however, ASK me a question." One of my students read the sign yesterday, tilted his head to one side and said, "I don't get it." I hope that means he's never heard the wonderful word 'ask' slandered in this manner.

So, one year of teaching and I now have pet peeves. Oh, and I hate being called 'Miss'. I have name, thanks.

Google 2001

If your favorite search engine hasn't reminded you yet, Google turns 10 years old this month. In celebration, they have put their oldest available archives, from 2001, up for the public to search and reminisce. Try typing in September 11. Apparently, their archive is from before that fateful day; nothing of consequence pops up. It was a different world back then. This article in the Washington Post does an excellent job of walking you down memory lane, pointing out things long forgotten, and some things which are all too familiar.

I Googled this very blog and was disappointed not to find it. Then I realized I didn't start writing it until October of 2002.

So, I searched the archives of my own memory and dug up a few personal highlights of 2001. Here's what I came up with:

- Last year on JV soccer, Jobie teaches me how to run
- Paul graduates high school
- Summer trip to West Virginia. Cold showers for a week. Good times.
- Bud dies
- Meet Amy, one of my best friends, after history class
- September 11th
- Do tech for "The Foreigner" until soccer starts, my first play at UHS
- I make Varsity soccer & split my head open on a teammate's chin in the second week of practice. The scar still hurts sometimes when its cold or rainy.
- "Scenes from a Tuesday in September"
- IB kicks it up a notch
- Pre-Calculus kicks my butt (Mrs. Parrish, round one)
- Klongerbo's class, find out that I LOVE English, I learn how to write a good essay
- TOK with Mr. Boyte, wonder if dragons can fit in tea boxes
- Driver's License...woot (still accident free and only 1 ticket!)

What do you remember from 2001?

The Boot Game

Every year, Colonial and University battle for a boot painted red and black on one side and blue and gold on the other. This game has come to be known as the Boot Game, and it is undoubtedly the one game out of every season that each team wants to win the most (except for maybe University vs. Timber Creek, but that's a newer rivalry). Six years ago, I stood on the east side of the stadium. This year, I stood on the west side looking towards the bleachers I had run up and down countless times in my high school career.

It was strange walking around to the far side of the field, greeting people in red and black. Even more strange were the cheers of, "Let's go, Colonial, let's go!" issuing from my mouth. I felt weird cheering against my Alma Mater, but at the same time, I couldn't possibly cheer against my students. After all, I don't really know anyone at UHS anymore.

I contemplated wearing my University Varsity jacket over a Colonial faculty shirt, but decided that the ribbing I would get from everyone wasn't worth it. Besides, it's September and therefore WAY too hot to wear a leather and woolen jacket.

Anyway, I walked over to the home side to watch the band. As I stood there, it struck me that I was looking, to borrow lyrics from Ragtime, "toward the future, from the past."

My Week In Pictures (Sort Of)

Since I don't have much time to write anything substantive, I thought I'd attempt to follow through on my birthday resolution by taking more pictures and sharing them with the world. By the world I mean the handful of people that read this blog. Anyway, here you go.


I took this sitting at the traffic light getting off the toll road a few days ago. The moon has been charming the past few days, appearing larger than normal. This particular evening I was captivated by the sight of the setting sun in my rear view mirror and the rising moon in the sky above it. Since I was driving at the time and could therefore not look at the screen on my digital camera, I couldn't get the best shot. This is the best of the set.

We found this little guy hanging out in the back hallway in the PAC. I assumed at the time that he was fleeing the rain from Tropical Storm Fay. But in hindsight, I realized he's an amphibian, so that really wouldn't make any sense. Also, there wasn't any flooding at school. Maybe he just wanted to learn something about Drama.

I spotted this hot air balloon on the drive to work early last week. My initial reaction was, wow, that's a huge advertising balloon. Anyway, I can only assume the flight was sponsored by Leslie Pool Supply. If you look closely, you can actually see the guy standing in the basket.



I spent several hours on Sunday night finishing the floor plan for "The Odd Couple". Bard provided a welcome distraction from my line weights. After jumping on my lap and deigning to have his chin scratched, he crawled behind and then under my drafting board. I lifted the front side and snapped a few shots as he played with a whistle and an old hair tie until he grew tired of the entertainment and took his snobby self downstairs.


The last time I took a mailing tube to school it disappeared and I found it several days later in two battered pieces. So, in an attempt to not have my possessions destroyed, I taped a note onto this version. It reads: "This is a mailing tube designed to transport documents. It is not the plaything of teenage hoodlums. It is not to be used as an imaginary sword or projectile. Thank you."

Taken on the drive home. I just like the jiggly lights. They're pretty.

The End of a Languid Summer

Well, it's August. The new school year begins in a couple of weeks. Although one week of freedom remains, I have accomplished very little this summer. There was plenty of sleeping, reading for fun, playing Nintendo, and absolutely no working. It is generally around this time of year, at the end of periods such as this that I begin to feel particularly worthless. I've been unable to motivate myself to actually get things done, save for a few days here and there. A handful of days of productivity in two full months of vacation.

I remember feeling this way at the end of the summer before my Senior year of high school. I'd put off all of my summer work until that last week and spent most of it researching, writing, translating and reading.

I've been so lazy this summer that I've hardly written anything, and have failed to meet my post quota again. Let's hope the school year gives me something to write about.

Here, in the spirit of self-loathing, is list of things I wanted to do this summer and didn't:

• Learn at least 2 new songs on the piano
  
• Read 6 plays (I read 4)
• Find a One Act to do at Districts
  
• Redo my room
• Loose 20 pounds (I've lost 10-ish. Okay, 8-ish)
• Design the Fall play (I've done one [bad] sketch)
• Write lesson plans for the first 2 semesters of school (ambitious, I know)
• Make something
• Grow spiritually
• Learn how to care for theatrical lights

Thing I have done:

• Cleaned my room (hey, that's an accomplishment)
• Watched a whole lot of movies (yay Netflix)
• Doodled a LOT
• Learned to play "Sweet Home Alabama" on the guitar
• Beaten Mario Kart Wii
• Beaten Super Mario Galaxy
• Beaten Battalion Wars II (are you getting a good picture of my summer?)
• Finished Pride and Prejudice
• Slept a LOT
  

Hi, I'm Laura, and I'm a Pack Rat

One look at my bedroom would tell you that I'm a pack rat. I don't throw things away if they have an iota of sentimental value. So, my room looks like an 8th grade art class or a very large refrigerator door. Pictures from trips, high school memorabilia, and bits and pieces of things from college clutter my bookshelf, floor, desk and walls. There is just too much stuff. It's no wonder that I have been dragging my feet in beginning the daunting task of cleaning and redesigning my room. I don't even know what color to paint it. Some things need to go, I'm sure of that; but I don't want to take the walk down memory lane only to find out how much I've forgotten.

It will eventually have to happen, because I'm going a little bit stir-crazy with all of the clutter.

What I Miss About Tallahassee

My trip up to Tallahassee this past weekend reminded me what I miss about it as a city. I'm refer not to the people, relationships, or student life, but the city itself, things that are unique to our state's capital. Tallahassee has an abundance of really good homegrown restaurants, Tallahassee originals, small shops that have grown enough to have one or two locations in the city, but nowhere else. Hopkins Eatery, Cool Grindz (I ignore the tacky Z at the end for the sake of their White Chocolate Mochas, Cafe Con Leche and Chai Lattes), The Coffee Pub, The Pitaria, and One Fresh Stir-Fry are some of my favorites. Even better, I have memories tied to each and every one of these.

I used to go the the Pitaria during a break after some of my theatre classes because it was right down the street. It was also the last place I ate in Tallahassee before moving back to Orlando. I used to have D-Group at the Cool Grindz downtown when we got tired of the ever busy Starbucks. C. and I used to chat with the baristas while they made our drinks at the one on Monroe and Tharpe. One Fresh was an after-church favorite. They also have amusing signs in the dining area.I took a picture of this one for Dad. If you can't read it through the glare, it says "Did You Close Your Garage Door?" Sound Familiar?

The Coffee Pub was probably my favorite study spot, especially in the mid-afternoon before all of the college kids got there. They had these really comfortable chairs in the corner by the window which allowed for copious amounts of people watching and a good deal of studying as well. That's where I studied for my Modern British Lit exam, and where I wrote the first few pages of a Senior Seminar paper. On one occasion, I was surprised to find non-college students in a very college-type coffee shop. I had grown accustomed to the evening hours when every seat was occupied by laptop laden students. So, one Wednesday morning I was surprised to see a few older ladies walk in with their knitting to sit, drink coffee and chat.

Eulogy for a Break

Let us all remove our hats and observe a moment of silence for the untimely demise of Spring Break. Enjoy this last moment of student-free bliss and look toward the coming weeks with tenacious resolve and perseverance, for there remain only 9 weeks until the carefree days of summer are upon us. April is the cruelest month, for it brings with it Spring Break, a small taste of the happiness to come, only to yank it rudely from our fingers and push us back into the daily grind.

So, school restarts tomorrow. Can you tell I'm not looking forward to it? Perhaps that's to do with me not quite knowing what is coming next in my classes. I have a vague idea of what to do next, but no definite, "This is what we're doing today." I'll figure it out before 9:20 tomorrow morning when the kids walk through my classroom door. In a perfect and ideal world in which I'm someone else, I would have spent the last five days planning the rest of the year and writing out my daily lesson plans to alleviate the stress of the next few weeks. Instead I spent it sleeping, reading Jane Austen, and watching movies. In my defense, we had friends in town for the first half of the week, so I consider myself excused from accomplishing anything, but Wednesday through Friday is completely my fault. I did get bits and pieces of things done for the show (compiling the massive props list and creating a build list), but other school related things were completely ignored.

At times like this, I'm reminded of my 9th grade summer reading assignment, The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People, and wonder if paying attention to that might have helped in my life as a student and now as an adult [do you hear laughter?]. It is possible. I am, however, inclined to think that the timeless words of Dr. Stephen R. Covey would have been more beneficial had I not thought that "paradigm" was pronounced "par-a-dig-um," and indeed, believed it to mean "something beside a digm (whatever that was)," for the entire summer. In any case, the years since have brought me to believe that I'm just not a proactive person.

All of this to say, I didn't get much done. But I did read some Jane Austen.

An Old Light Bulb

I'm beginning to get burned out. It's not difficult to figure out why. Since we got back from Christmas break, I've been working intensely on getting ready for the District Thespian Competition this coming weekend. We are almost ready. Almost, however, is far from where I think we should be. With a little over 48 hours until our first event performs on Saturday, the group sat on the edge of the stage, reluctant to use the remaining time for rehearsal. I fail to grasp the logic behind this behavior. The knowledge that a panel of judges will sit behind a table looking for errors with which to rip you apart would scare me into rehearsal, whether I liked the piece or not.

This procrastination on the part of my students is beginning to drive me insane. How could they not be freaking out about this? Perhaps they are more courageous than I, for they do not fear the pen-wielding judges. Perhaps they are simply foolish. I actually have two students who have yet to rehearse together. Neither of them takes Drama, so I don't see them to remind them that, by the way, the judges are merciless, and they're representing the troupe, not just their sorry selves. They'd better not say they, "proudly represent" our troupe, because frankly, them going is a courtesy to a senior who was in Christmas Carol before dropping out/getting the boot.

I'm getting burned out. Spending afternoons with unmotivated high school students will do that to you.

Parking Stickers

I cleaned out my car a couple of weeks ago, ridding the windshield of the parking stickers from college. I've finished that chapter in my life, and pulling the stickers off the glass was just putting a period at the end of the last sentence. Being the pack rat I am, I wanted to keep them, so I taped them into my journal. I like keeping things that mean something, have some kind of sentimental value.

For me, the represent membership in a club to which I no longer belong. Last year I lived at ADK House, I was one of the girls, I could park there with no fear of the ever roaming tow truck. That bit of my past is over and done with. If I went back and knocked on the door there is a 50% chance that the girl opening it won't recognize me.

Its the same with the FSU parking sticker. I no longer have a right or reason to be on campus. Driving down I-75 on the way back to school, I used to get this feeling of solidarity as I looked through the rear view mirror and saw the same sticker in the windshield behind me. That person and I are alike in at least this, we have that it common. I don't have that anymore. As I drove up I-75 a few days ago to visit a friend, I didn't see any of these parking passes. I wouldn't have recognized an FSU sticker even if I saw one.

In case you're wondering about the pictures, I finally got a digital camera and have been going picture crazy ever since. It's a good thing. I'm a visual person, so having a way to show you what I'm talking about is a good thing in my opinion.

I really don't want to go to work tomorrow. I had planned to get some lesson plans done over the break, but true to form, I procrastinated and haven't really done any of it. I think I know what I'm doing with them tomorrow, but beyond that I have no idea. I have some more thoughts on this, but I really should get some sleep so that I'm not unprepared and exhausted tomorrow.

Finally, a Break

It's nearly Thanksgiving, yet it feels nothing like it. Sure, the weather has finally taken a turn towards chilly, and the darkness comes faster, but there is a definite lack of--well--something. Perhaps it's that I'm not examining my schedule to see if I can cut class on Wednesday in order to go home on Tuesday. I'm not making Thanksgiving plans. My life has been so consumed with everything else (and by "everything" I mean only one thing: work) that the thought of stopping and doing something other than think about the long list of things I have to do to get "A Christmas Carol" up by December 6 is ridiculous. On top of all that, I have to worry about fund raisers for International Thespians Society and registering for District Thespian competition at the end of next week.

Despite all of the stress and endless lists of things I have to do, I'm having fun. Each day I spend at work, the more I am convinced that I have to best job in the world. It has it's downsides, not the least of which are money and paperwork, but everything else is a blast. There are problems to solve, it's challenging mentally, physically, and emotionally. I'm being stretched as a person, and I'm loving it (in a non-McDonald's kind of way).